If you had been here - Martha's lament

Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died" (John 11:21)

The raising of Lazarus
by Duccio di Buoninsegna

Unless you are reading this story for the first time, you already know the outcome. Lazarus has died, and his sisters Mary and Martha have called for Jesus. When he eventually arrives, Jesus tells Martha that her brother Lazarus will rise again. Martha responds "I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day." After assuring Martha that he is the resurrection and the life, Jesus asks Martha if she believes that whoever believes in him will never die. Her answer? "I believe that you are the Messiah, the son of God".

So Martha's initial words "Lord, if you had been here my brother would not have died" can simply be read as a statement of faith: "I know that you can heal the dying." After all, she goes on to add "I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask." (11.22) Martha expresses a faith in Jesus that is more than justified when Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead.

But let's look back at the situation before Jesus' arrival, from Martha's point of view. Her brother Lazarus becomes ill and is obviously dying. She and Mary are desperate - not only do they love Lazarus, but the prospects for two unmarried women with no male family support are grim.

They hear that Jesus is not far away and send a message "Lord, he whom you love is ill". They have been friends of Jesus for some time, they have lovingly ministered to him and believe that he cares about them. They have also seen and heard enough about what Jesus has done amongst the sick and dying to believe that he will surely be able to do something for Lazarus.


They hear that he received their message, but Jesus doesn't come. Lazarus gets worse and still Jesus doesn't come. Lazarus dies. Friends and well-wishers from Jerusalem arrive to console them, but Jesus still doesn't come to them. Martha and Mary feel puzzled, then anxious and then abandoned. They thought that Jesus cared, but maybe they were wrong. Perhaps he was just too busy to bother with their needs.

And then Jesus arrives, with his disciples. Lazarus has been dead for four days now. Four days! Surely there's more than a hint of bitterness in Martha's voice when she says "Lord, if you had been here..." Faith, certainly, but also disappointment and an unspoken question "Lord, why didn't you come? Didn't you care?"

We know why Jesus didn't come, because we've read the explanation he gives to his disciples (John 11.4-14). But Martha doesn't know, and Jesus doesn't offer any explanation to Martha. He just questions her about her faith in him.

Jesus at the home of Martha and Mary
by Diego Velaquez

We know from elsewhere that Martha is not a calm and stoical person. She has expressed her frustration to Jesus at least once before. Left in the kitchen to do all the meal preparation while her sister sat listening to Jesus, she questioned his concern for her needs:  "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" (Luke 10:40)

So it's difficult to imagine that she gently murmured those words: "Lord, if you had been here..." She's a grieving, disappointed, frustrated human being. Her respect for Jesus and her understanding of his mission prevents her from being peevish or sarcastic, but it's hard not to hear a note of bitterness, even anger, in her initial words. Jesus has let her down. Her faith in his ability to heal is not diminished, but her trust in his concern for her and her family is shaken.

Anger with God as evidence of faith

In fact, anger with God is almost always a statement of faith, even if it's faith in crisis. If we didn't believe that God is real, there would be no point in getting angry with him. Adults don't get angry with Santa Claus or the Tooth fairy. Likewise, if we didn't believe that God has the power to act, we could hardly complain that he didn't answer our prayer. It would be like getting angry with our children for not helping us to pay the mortgage. We know that they are powerless to do so. Anger with God is, at it's core, an expression of our belief that God exists and is powerful.

Sometimes we don't recognise this. People who are angry with God often deny that they believe in his existence. Yet they go on being angry, and the anger comes to the surface as bitterness against the church, against Christians, against life itself. Many atheists are really angry believers.

Anger against God is sometimes based on a misunderstanding of God's character and promises. If we expect God to do something which the Bible gives us no warrant to expect (for instance, keeping us free from all trouble and pain, or giving us worldly success) then we have no reason for nursing anger against him. We need to deal with our anger by learning more about God, which will lead us to repentance.

But what if our anger is like Martha's, based on our past experience and observation of what God is like. What do we do when our expectations based on God's word are frustrated, when our faithful prayers meet with no response, when God seems to have abandoned us? What do we do with our anger then?

Martha expressed her anger quite openly to Jesus. She didn't shake her fist, perhaps she didn't even raise her voice, but she stated the truth quite plainly and directly to him - "If you had been here, my brother would not have died". Mary did the same. They didn't complain to everyone around them that Jesus was uncaring, but privately they said enough to let him know what was going through their minds. They were respectful, faithful, but honest.

Others in the Bible also expressed their anger and disappointment towards God - Abraham, Moses, Jeremiah, David. And God's response? He didn't strike them down, or say "How dare you speak that way to me, have you forgotten that I am the God of the Universe!" He let them speak, and then he answered them in a way that gave them a new and different perspective of himself. We see the same gracious response when Jesus speaks to Martha and Mary.

(This is part of an occasional series of articles on Biblical characters who experienced doubt. You may also like to read:
 Jesus, are you the one? - John the Baptist
Unless I see - Doubting Thomas